2nd Training

I was having alot of problems doing the Kalari falls. Especially fall number 6 where I have to roll forward with both my shoulders. The kids were laughing at me because they could do it so well whereas I was struggling clumsily.

I tried very hard and wondered why I had so much difficulty. It came down to a question of guts. I simply did not dare to do it. Though I knew in my head that I should be bold with my movement and follow through with the trajectory of the movement in order to execute it right, I could not. In doing such stuff, I've learnt the hard way that doing it with hesitation is the best way to injure yourself as such movements require a certain momentum that should not be disrupted.

Each time I try, I can feel my heart beat faster and this tingling sensation of the skin and sculpt that feels as if my sense of touch is "opened". After some time I simply gave up on fall 6 and continued doing the rest.

Master was scolding some of my classmates for landing too hard when they do the falls. I didn't notice it earlier but after he mentioned it, I realised that they do land quite hard because its very audible. I wondered if doing that damages their spine or other bones.

I was relieved to do the basic movements so that I can get away from doing the falling and tumbling. But once again I was reminded of the amount of memory work that has to be done in Kalari. When master gives a certain instruction, we have to remember what set of movements we have to execute. In execution, we are also constantly corrected for our posture and the precision in our execution. His mantra: "Below your chin, your elbow, below your elbow, your knee".

I feel like I am forced to concentrate due to the requirements of this martial art and wondered if it helps to train concentration because it is required in the practice. Prior to this I had thought that the concentration comes from a physiologically awakened state. But I guess it's still too early to tell.

Another difficulty I had was in the "Yogic Breathing". Whenever we do very physically demanding moves, we'll tend to pant after. Thereafter, my master will lead in Yogic breathing. I found it extremely difficult to slow down the breathing so dramatically after a demanding exercise, I feel like I did not have enough breath in my lungs each time. When master leads in 1 breath intake, in that moment, I would already have taken 3 breaths. The feeling of being out of breath was quite terrible and I did not know how to deal with it. I asked master about it after the practice and he said that it just takes some getting used to.

I also asked master if he knew what meyyu kannakaku was and he said he didn't know. After I explained that it is the Malayalam expression for "the body is all eyes", immediately he knew what I was talking about. He said that most Indians in our country speak Tamil and Hindi, the Malayalam dialect was not something he was familiar with. This made me confused. Not because I assumed he spoke Malayalam but because I assumed that he was taught in Malayalam. I got this impression from the fact that Zarrilli refers to malayalam terms constantly in his writings. So when I realise that Master uses english to teach and names alot of moves by numbers, I wondered if what I am learning is a singaporean adaptation that sheds the cultural roots of the practice and keeps only the form.


K8